Can you mourn a living parent ?

October 30, 2020, Lena Hellblom Sjögren

All Saints´Day – thoughts about the possibility for an alienated and divided child to mourn

All Saints´ Day – a day to remember the dead

Those buried we can mourn

Often remembering the good they did

The child cannot mourn the living mother

Made dead in the child´s life

The child cannot mourn the living father

Made dead in the child´s life

The child is helped to hate them

To forget all good about them

By whom?

By the other parent

The one who hates 

The one who  makes the child also hate

                      the once loved parent

The parent who has taken control

The parent who controls the child´s life

And thoughts

The child is not allowed to mourn

But to forget all good about the precluded parent

The secluded child can not mourn

The grief inside the child grows

to unexplainable anger

to unexplainable pain

to distrust

to selfhate

to hate the parent wishing the child to grow in love

to always defend the one who hates

The child is asked by the helpers and decisionmakers:

Who do you choose?

They  follow what they see as the child´s own will

Not realizing they have made the child responsible to

have killed a loved parent the child has been taught to hate

They feel satisfied they have listened to the child

The evil made to stone

The child who must not mourn the erased parent

The child who cannot mourn that parent

The child made half

An erased parent longing for the lost child

also this day

I shall see

the beauty of the clouds

and the silhouettes of the trees

against the sky

I get also this day

I shall wait for you

       also today